Doin’ Donuts

I don’t want to be a content creator. Never have, never will. I’m too tired for it.

That being said, my somewhat regular efforts at putting my work out into the world with more frequency has been paying off in some cool and unexpected ways. I’ve essentially relegated Instagram and Tik Tok to the trash heap of time, and have been way more active on LinkedIn (which is a whole other thing lol). In the last few months I’ve connected with so many people in the gaming industry, which is ultimately exactly where I had always hoped to end up.

In getting to talk to so many other game-crazy art nerds, I’ve felt the swift kick in the ass I needed to put the last 12+ months of “I should really learn Blender” to bed. “Luddite” isn’t exactly the right word, I don’t think, but picking up new software has always been a struggle. I look at the expansive manuals, hours of tutorials, and endless FAQs, and just see this Sisyphean clusterfuck of a reality wherein I’m desperately trying to shove grains of sand back into the top half of the hourglass, you know?

Figma took years, but I’ve gotten good enough to teach other people how to do it. Procreate took years, but I’m able to get from concept to finished piece with relative ease (ADHD permitting). Here’s to hoping that Blender will be different since I’ve spent the last 4 years doing way more RGB than CMYK. And if it’s not, well here’s to hoping that it won’t be nearly as stressful since making my rent doesn’t depend on it (yet).

The intersection of gaming, making weird art, and lofty fiction has always been where I’ve felt more fulfilled. Whether I’m an active or passive participant doesn’t matter. I’m pretty firmly right-brained, and have definitely myself in pretty deep, in the absence of ever really feeling like I fit in anywhere else. This might be my last line of defense in the self-care toolkit. Everybody loves donuts.